The fiance and I were watching I Think I Love My Wife last night. We love that movie. It really is a crack up. There is a scene in the movie where Chris Rock is being reprimanded by his boss for missing a meeting. He missed this important meeting for some chick who seemed hell bent on having an affair with him. While his boss verbally rips him a new asshole he says ” you can lose alot of money chasing women, but you’ll never lose women chasing money“. All of a sudden my fiance is like “uh huh that’s right”. I quickly gave him the side eye and pinched him hard. Then I promptly informed him that if I found out he had cheated I’d drop his ass in a hot second and keep it moving.
The interesting thing is he’s kind of right. I know TONS of women who stay in shitty relationships because they are materially tied to it. They could have emotionally check out long ago, but as long as that man is providing material goods they stay.
My best friend Drae and I talked about this topic this morning. He uses Jay-Z and Beyonce as an example. We know she’s worth a couple million but she’s nowhere near Jay-Z’s wealth. She probably feels like her man better have twice what she has or it’s a no go lol. We all know she would not be with him if he was some regular dude trying to make it. But to each his own I guess.
Does money/material generosity play a role in your relationships? Does it make a person more attractive to you?
Till next time…
Filed under: Finances, Relationships, fashion, money
money definitely doesn’t play role in my relationship; we both work together or else we’d be broke! But I know tons of other people (even relatives) who harp on the money aspect of things rather than focusing on love or common interest or communication. But it goes both ways. I think while women stay for money, men keep them for personal “trophies.” Not ALL men, but some…
I am extremely independent (to a fault) and could never imagine letting someone take care of me. I have also had the deadbeat boyfriend though and find it much more attractive if a man makes his own money and I don’t have to worry about it. Personally, I like separate banks accounts… I pay my half, he pays his and then we do what we want with our own hard earned money!
I saw that movie, there was one line that got me, but I cant for the life of me think of it right now.
I’m at a toss up with that one. I cant decide if I want to marry for love or money. Can I marry for funny? lol
Sorry to be shallow but money plays a major role. If he can’t take care of his self and then me (not saying i can’t take care of myself) why would I need him. We should both be financially stable
I, too, love that movie…. and that line in particular resonated with me! (my boyfriend had a similar reaction, and i had to look at him sideways as well. lmao)
I wouldnt say that “money” per se would keep me in a relationship that i would otherwise leave…. but i think there is definitely something to be said about the comfort of knowing that man can provide financial security for a potential family.
i fully intend to marry a man who can provide for me and a familly…. and so, in a sense, i guess that does make a new beau “more attractive,” to learn that he is doing very well for himself. i think its less an issue of being a “gold-digger”, and more an issue of thinking about your future and a sense of stability. as a woman, that’s very important to me. while i plan to work and have my own, i want to know that he can take care of the household should we both decide that we want me to take time off when the children come, and so forth.
Money helps to make a guy more appealing to a woman. This happens in several ways. In the first place, if you have a choice of two lifestyles, one in which you will have to work 40-50 hours/week, usually at a fairly stressful, thankless job, and worry about making ends meet, and the other in which you don’t have to do this, and also have a good deal of security and comfort, it makes sense to choose the latter.
Money helps the guy be more appealing in more subtle ways as well. A guy with a lot of money can afford to take you anywhere you like to go, send you an extravagant arrangement of flowers, take you on wonderful trips to Paris or Rome.
He can pick you up in a terrific car and take you to wonderful restaurants with impeccable service, great food, and panaramic views. He can take you out for the day on his boat. In short, he has the wherewithal to make you feel excited during your time with him.
And when you’re thinking about the guys you’re dating, you don’t typically think – this guy can afford to take me anywhere I want to go while the other guy takes me only to modest places. You think on a more emotional level – the one guy is cooler than the other guy, the one guy excites you more than the other guy, etc.
That statement is so true from what I have seen in my life. I think the statement alone is not just for people in a deadend relationship…I think it applies to couples that are working together in a positive aspect also.
RH~
I currently have an asian girlfriend and whereas I normally go 50/50 with a Western girlfriend she tells me I pay rent and food because that’s what asian men do. I know that’s true but the problem is when the guy is paying for everything and see’s the woman spending without consideration – because she doesn’t have to earn it – it tips the balance in the relationship and leaves you feeling like you’ve got a trophy wife even though you don’t want one. I’d love to do the 50/50 but she’s said – no way. I feel a woman who earn’s her own money and is responsible for spending it is far more attractive. And if we’re going to get down and dirty – for me – this is the only way it can be ‘fair’……